Monday, September 2, 2013

Words of Comfort: Some Suggestions

"Mr. Comfort, can you suggest an obvious fact that I can debate publicly to rile people up? A b-list actor to help spread my name? A monkey suit I can rent to hand out pamphlets? I just need an idea to strike nerves. How about denying the holocaust or taking away womens' civil rights, claiming that ribs aren't people? I'd like to make approx $3,112, 224 million annually and not have to pay tax on it, or give anything to charity. Anyways, thanks for any ideas in advance…." D.T. 

Your suggestions won't work. Instead, link up with an actor (like Kirk Cameron) whose last movie "Fireproof" grossed over $33,000,000 at the box office. You don't need a monkey suit because as a believer in the fantasy of evolution, you believe you are one. Don't be so foolish to deny the holocaust, because it is observable through historical film. It didn't supposedly happen 60,000,000 years ago and need the exercising of blind faith. Always stand up for the rights of children that are legally killed the womb, and whatever you do, don't take a personal wage of $3,112,224. That would be ridiculous. Do what I do. Ride a bike to work, and draw a take-home annual wage of $86,000 after taxes. And then use the rest of that $3,112,224 to pay for the huge mortgage on the ministry building, for insurances, and to pay your staff of 24 so they can feed their families. Make sure you keep your giving secret (as the Bible says to) because only hypocrites sound a trumpet when they give.  I hope this helps. 

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